Can you spot the local wildlife?

There is all kinds of wildlife around us. Here is some advice on how to identify Bears and Wildlife.

Boo Flannel describes it best in his song What's an Otter?

"Bears are ranked by fur and aggression, and how they are dressing I forgot to mention. A Bear can be active or passive, a bag of bones or Oh My! massive. As you can see there is quite a few classes of Bears in the forest boys. Better watch your porridge boys!"

We love that you are here finding out about Bear Culture. Please understand that it is all in fun and meant to uplift not denigrate anyone.

"These codes were all made up by people before me, if I offend then please ignore me. There is no way to tell every part of the story, ' cause no one fits neatly in a category."

Check out the full lyrics on this page.

Common Bear

"A Bear's a furry, stocky guy with facial hair".

The Common Bear is of Caucasian descent. As all Bears has body hair and a corpulent build. He is playful and fun to hang around with. They can be tops, bottoms or versatile which can also put them in a sub-category like Papa Bear or Mama Bear (listed below).

Brown Bear

Bears come in all kinds of skin and fur color. Brown Bears are identified as those of darker skin and fur. As all Bears, they have body hair and a corpulent build. They are also playful and fun to be around. They can be tops, bottoms or versatile which can also put them in a sub-category like Papa Bear or Mama Bear (listed below).

Black Bear

Bears come in all kinds of skin and fur color. Black Bears are of African or African-American descent. As all Bears, they have body hair and a corpulent build. They are very playful and fun to spend time with. They can be tops, bottoms or versatile which can also put them in a sub-category like Papa Bear or Mama Bear (listed below).

Grizzly Bear

Bears come in all kinds of skin and fur color but also aggression plays a part in their identification. Grizzly Bears are of any ethnicity but tend to be sexually more aggressive than others either as tops or bottoms. As all Bears, they have body hair but are particularly corpulent in build. They are very playful sexually. They can be tops, bottoms or versatile which can also put them in a sub-category like Papa Bear or Mama Bear (listed below).

Berenstien Bear

Berenstien Bears are those identified as of Jewish ethnicity but of any nationality. As all Bears, they have lots of body hair and a corpulent build. They are playful, caring creatures who are fun to spend time with. They can be tops, bottoms or versatile which can also put them in a sub-category like Papa Bear or Mama Bear (listed below).

Polar Bear

Polar Bears have white body hair but can be of any ethnicity or  nationality. As all Bears, they have plenty of body hair and a corpulent build. They are playful, caring . Polar bears tend to have fun personalities. They can be tops, bottoms or versatile which can also put them in a sub-category like Papa Bear or Mama Bear (listed below).

Cub

"and a Cub is always showing off his derriere".

Just like there are Bears, there are cubs. These are hairy and younger Bears. They can have large bodies or are working on it for their winter years. Cubs come in every color and ethnicity.  As all Bears they play well with others.  They can be tops, bottoms or versatile but in general we've found them in the wild mating with both Papa and Mama Bears (listed below).

Panda Bear

Panda Bears are named for their ethnicity. Pandas are Bears of Asian descent. They may not have as much fur as others but still maintain a corpulent appearance. They can also be part of other categories.

Koala Bear

Koala Bears are named as such more for their nationality than the color of their skin or fur. It refers to Australian men. Listen to their very attractive accent. They too like all Bears tend to be very joyful and good company.

Badger

Badgers are not usually heavy. They are still hairy but more on the athletic side. Fun in nature despite their more main stream beauty. They come in every color and ethnicity which can also be described in sub-categories such as Honey Badger, Brown Badger, Black Badger, etc.

Otter

"What's an Otter for you?"

Otters are usually a little younger than most Bears. They are heavy but not very hairy at all. Their build tends to be slender but not necessarily muscular. You can usually spot them sporting whiskers. They come in every color and ethnicity.

Seal

Seal Bears are mostly hairless but still heavy. It is particularly easy to spot them around water like the pool or the beach. The water makes their skin slick and smooth. They still share the fun and out going disposition characteristic of all Bears in general. Seals come in every color and ethnicity.

Fox

Foxes are very distinguished and typically very smart and debonair. Normally they have white or salt and pepper hair. They are particularly clever and enjoy the finer things in life. Foxes can be of any color or ethnicity. One of the most popular is the Silver Fox!

Wolf

Wolves come in many colors and ethnicity. They can often bee spotted in the great outdoors and many are bikers. They are rugged and many are sexually aggressive. Wolves are very popular with bottoms of any Bear category.

Pig / Boar

Pigs or Boars tend to be bottoms and very aggressive sexually. They mate across the whole spectrum of Bear Categories and have fetishistic tendencies. Sexually they are very adventurous. Still they tend to be great company in social situations. You can find them in every color and ethnicity. This is a very controversial sub-category of Bear.

Muscle Bear

Muscle Bears can be found in their natural habitat the weight room of the local gym. They are just as hairy and large as other Bears but spend much of their energy working on growing their musculature. These Bears can be docile or aggressive in nature but considered eye candy by non-Bears.

Papa Bear

Papa Bears tend to form families complete with Mama Bear or a Cub. Papa Bears can be of any color, ethnicity or nationality. They tend to be tops to versatile and are very sought after by most other bear categories.

Mama Bear

Mama Bears are loved by everyone. They are usually spotted looking to make a home with a Papa Bear. They come in every ethnicity and color. Their sexual behavior is mostly versatile. It is common for Mama Bears to be particularly fond of entertaining dinner guests in their family cave.

Leather Bear

Leather Bears are named as such because they enjoy the attire and lifestyle of the Leather Community. They can be top, bottoms or versatile and tend to enjoy rough play with other Bears of sadomasochistic nature. These Bears come in any color or ethnicity. You know if you spotted one because of the leather boots and/or harness.

Bear Admirer

This a member of the Bear Community who is not necessarily a Bear. They come from every walk of life, in any ethnicity, shape and size. In many cases they tend to be smaller in size and that' is why they appreciate and get turned on by the size difference. Although they admire and appreciate Bears they may not have a strong sexual attraction towards them.

Goldie-Locks

Goldie-Locks are women of any age, size, shape or ethnicity who thoroughly enjoy the company of Bears. In other communities she would be known affectionately as a "fag hag". These women enjoy partying with the best of them and in many cases out party even the largest Bears.

"Better watch your porridge boys!"

Bear Chaser

When it comes to conventional men there is a group who love and are particularly sexually attracted to large, corpulent Bears. In other walks of life they are referred to as "Chubby Chasers". Bear chasers can be of any ethnicity and size. It is surprising to find that the vast majority of them are slender in body type.

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Complete Study Guide

Complete Lyrics

Ring the bell, DING!

School's in session.

Pencils up 'cause

Here is your first lesson.

Bears are ranked

by fur and aggression

And how they're dressing

I forgot to mention.

A Bear can be

active or passive.

A bag of bones or

Oh, My! Massive!

As you can see

there is quite a few classes

of Bears in the forest boys,

Better watch your

porridge boys!

That's a Bear.

That's a Cub.

That's an Otter. HEY!

What's an Otter? HEY!

Whats' an Otter for you?

A Bear's a furry,

stocky guy

with facial hair.

An Otter's also hairy

but not everywhere.

A Wolf is like an

Otter that

doesn't play fair,

and a cub is

always showing off

his derriere.

A Papa is a Papa

and likes to

go on top.

A Mama goes

back and forth like

a dirty mop.

A Leather Bear

is one that grew up

playing cop.

And a Pig

never learned

the meaning of

the word stop.

A Polar Bear's

hair is silver or white.

A Goldie-Locks'

a girl who likes

to party all night.

A Chubby Chaser

thinks big men

are all right.

Admirers surf

Bear porn websites.

These codes were

all made up by people

before me.

if i offend then

please ignore me.

There's noway  to

tell every part

of the story

'cause no one

fits neatly in

a category.

Now, a Mama

and a Papa and a Cub,

they make a trio.

Mama mia!

That's the way

to be. No?!

And they gather

from here to Italy to

lounge around in

kiddie pools,

Bears and bellies,

buds and drool.

That's a Bear.

That's a Cub.

That's an Otter. HEY!

What's an Otter? HEY!

Whats' an Otter for you?

That's a Bear.

That's a Cub.

That's an Otter. HEY!

What's an Otter? HEY!

Whats' an Otter for you?

That's a Bear.

That's a Cub.

That's an Otter. HEY!

What's an Otter? HEY!

Whats' an Otter for you?

Booking information please e-mail me booflannel@gmail.com or call 415-596-0109 based in San Francisco, CA.